Saturday, 16 February 2008

Atavistic terror


I have had a healthy Anglo-Saxon fear of these ever since the first (and, fortunately, only) 51 Club holiday. It involved a coach trip from Euston Station to the South of France and two weeks in a tent with an ever-changing variety of companions. The campsite facilities were, er, shared. The leitmotif for the holiday was "Was there anybody I never promised a Rose Garden to last night?", usually delivered in the direction of our fellow campers at maximum volume during breakfast. Breakfast, from the little I remember, consisted of two bottles of wine and 20 Rothmans King Size.

12 comments:

Diplomat said...

Don't splash those shoes.

Peter Ashley said...

It used to be a useful money-grabbing pub bet to get someone to say how many letter f's there were on a packet of 20 Rothmans.

Toby Savage said...

Remarkably clean starting blocks, if you don't mind me saying. You won't be surprised to hear that the ones of the same design in Libya are a tad more used. That bright gleam of porcelain long since gone in a Fatwah of Korean Sunsets. Peter.... 20?

A F-A said...

The advantage of these, it seems to me, is that when using them, one is unlikely to get Malcolm Muggeridge pissing on your feet. But I may be wrong.

Diplomat said...

Ron, Malcolm, Winston - what's the difference ? Mind you the product is good for softening the leather. Leaving new issue army boots in a bucket of horse wee ( see Grappa, Ron has it in bottles ) to soften them is standard practice.

Peter Ashley said...

Urinary products are also used in the production of Harris Tweed, who was also a comic detective on the back of the Eagle, drawn by John Ryan of Pugwash fame I think.
I can't remember how many f's on the Rothmans pack, but the true result was only revealed when the entire flip-top was dismembered. A propos all this, I once found a perfectly-made Sherman tank fashioned entirely from a Players No 6 packet in an ashtray in a Solihull pub.

Toby Savage said...

Seaman Stains and Master Bates never actually existed in Capt. Pugwash, but if you Google Capt Pugwash you can download the theme tune. In fact, I'll save you the bother. It's here: http://www.outpost221.com/pugwash/pugwash.htm
Bet it makes you smile.

A F-A said...

What's the difference between a Sherman tank and a teapot?

You only brewed up in a Sherman once......

Stonch said...

The one at Lucca's railway station haunts me. I've had to use it many times. How can a city so beautiful present a visitor with something so horrible?

Peter Ashley said...

This is why when I'm 'sur le continant' I just do it in my trousers.

cindy incidentally said...

They're a nightmare for us totty. Had to use one once in Tunisia without a light and i believe rats. I'm still traumatised.

Peter Ashley said...

My mother told me never to go in a public lavatory where someone had taken the lightbulbs out.